Sometimes Life Just Happens

Sometimes Life just happens. Call it the perfect storm, write it off to bad luck, blame it on others...we all have our ways of coping with it, but sometimes "shit happens". After 60 years of living, here's how I see it. Life is like a river and we are, each of us, some of the myriad of things that comprise that river. Life, like the river keeps on flowing, changing...predictable sometimes...unpredictable other times. That's Life. As we travel along, are moved by, are shaped by this river called Life, things can and will happen. We'll smack into unforeseen objects, we'll come up against barriers; we'll get shaped, worn, cradled, caressed, and carried. That's Life. The river that is Life is a given. OUR CHOICE is how we engage with this amazing river, this Life. We have the capacity to react, embrace, reject, swim against the current or with it, join with others on our journey, cling to, drag, down, lift up, help or not, enjoy, suffer, praise or rail against this river - this Life. We can choose to find a side eddy to spend our days away from the main flow, we can anchor ourselves to the bottom refusing to be pulled anywhere or do anything (until that unforeseen 100 year flood tears our anchor away).

As I have traveled this river I have seen more ways of dealing with the river of Life than you can imagine. That's Life. What I have learned about this river is that it consistently flows, changes, mutates from calm waters to turbulent rapids from shallow sandbars to profoundly deep channels; that each coping skill that I develop to navigate this amazing and wonderful world requires me to become skilled, and yet adaptable; capable of holding on, and knowing when to let go; accepting of the challenges, and welcoming of the blessings; and ultimately understanding that the river of Life is not about me, and, at the same time, is all about me. Someday, like all elements of this river, this Life, I will cease to exist as I am today. I will become something else in this river, this ceaseless flowing and shaping and changing world. Nothing is lost to this river of Life. What amazes me is that even as I am so small in the scheme of things, I can impact this world, often times in ways I will never know, and that is true of all of us. For myself, I choose love, a kind word, a thoughtful deed, a caring gesture, choosing forgiveness...my way of navigating this river, this Life.

When Life SCREAMS!!

Life SCREAMED at me last night, and WOW, did that throw me off for a bit.  So let me unpack what happened.  First, I WON!!!  I love to win things!  I am, like UBBER happy and bubbly and delighted when I WIN THINGS!  It's like life reaches out, and taps me on the shoulder and says, "YO!  MAMA!  You are the BOMB"  Soooooooooooo, I was on cloud nine.

I won a FREE session with my Soul Friend from Canada, Jen, who is ready to ILLUMINATE my life with her gifts and talents in order to help me be better at engaging in the world, building my tribe, and realizing my dreams!  How PERFECT is that?

OK, can you feel it?  The excitement is palpable!  The anticipation is ELECTRIC!  The stage is set and a super star (me) waits in the wings, ready to make my grand entrance and DAZZLE the world with my brilliance.  Then, ENTER LIFE, STAGE LEFT.

OUCH!  OK, so challenge one: I was ready... set... and... no go!  The internet went down, DRATS!  So I whipped out my red cape and became THE MASKED WONDER WOMAN.  I fudged with the router, I restarted the computer, repeatedly, I reset everything... and... nothing.  So, challenge two: really?  really?  how could I not have a PLAN B?  I pulled up facebook on my cell and messaged Jen regarding my woes, and Jen (in her capacity to adjust and adapt) suggested we talk on the phone instead of Skype.  GREAT!!  I was all in.  So I shut down the computer, cursed at the router a couple of times (for good measure) and then prepared to receive the information I needed via the phone.  OK, so here's where I make a long story short, I didn't understand that I had inadvertently failed to provide my phone number (important!), and my phone service decided to take the slow boat to China, and didn't process key messages from Jen until 10PM, when we had agreed to connect at 8PM.

LEARNINGS:  1) Have a plan B; 2) Getting wrapped around the axle is counter productive to what I am creating (a great reminder!); 3) When shit happens, accept, regroup, own, breath, let go, and move forward; 4) When Life SCREAMS, step back, relax, watch, and learn.  VOILA, out the other side and moving forward.  It's not that there won't be pot holes in the road of life, it's that we can choose to bemoan their existence or we can observe the effects and understand how to better deal the next time.  YEAH LIFE!

When Life and Inspiration Intersect

Someone once told me there is a place where what you are passionate about and what people want, intersect, and the challenge is finding that "sweet spot".  I agree.  In the last couple of weeks the work that I have been doing to articulate the gifts and talents that make me, uniquely me, has been integrated with purposefully working to connect with like minded people.  What I am finding is that there is a great deal of reflection that is involved with the experimentation.  Woven into this process is a constant reconnecting with what others, with successful web sites and connectivity are doing, and then sitting back and working through how what I've learned truly applies to me.  It is NOT about mimicry, but more about taking an idea that is specific from someone else's site, and then identifying the key concept behind the approach, and then looking at the idea through my unique lens to see if there is any relevance.  I find myself dialing, dialing dialing, and then rethinking and dialing some more.  I have gone through a number of iterations and I'm still iterating.

It is all good, in the end.  It is fun work and full of thought and analysis and experimentation, which is right up my alley.  I am enjoying the connectivity and the exploration tremendously.  I have found that it is really easy to loose one's self in surfing the web and finding all kinds of ideas and approaches.  It seems that the analysis is that the entry page has to be fast, easy, and to the point.  Mine isn't there yet, but I'm learning!  There are a number of key elements to most home pages, and it appears that there are a lot of visuals and a lot fewer words.  I seem to have that flipped, currently, but I'm working on that.  It also seems that personal creativity is a differentiator as well.  I have seen some great sites where the page had a "hand crafted" look to it.  I really like that approach being a graphics and drawing kind of person myself, so I'm thinking that I'm going to head in that direction. 

In the end it is about heart space.  The really good sites have lots of heart and soul to their voice.  I'm getting there with that as well.  The challenge, for me, is imagining the people that I'm talking to being in front of me and making what I'm writing, saying, presenting truly personal.  Developing a sincere and caring voice in an empty room populated only with the screen that I'm typing into, seems at times delusional.  I am getting it, but it certainly would be a lot easier if there really were a live audience present to use as a sounding board.  This process feels like delayed reaction on the part of the audience.  I create the material.  I put it out there, and then I round up some followers, friends and virtual guinea pigs run the concepts by and get some feedback from.  It's effective, just not immediate.  So I work on one element and then leave it alone for a bit to perk with the public, while I work on something else.  I'm learning pretty quickly that short attention spans and catchy quick ideas are the flavor that seems to be most palatable. 

What a great learning curve and what a fun project.  I'm excited about where it's going and what will come next and doors open and the horizon opens up.  I'll keep you posted.

Understanding Fear

In today's world there is a complexity to fear that can be mind boggling. We can find ourselves fearful of so many things coming from so many directions: fear of loss, fear of the unknown, fear of that which is out of our control, fear of emotional threats, fear of environmental threats, just to name a few. Fear can stop us from living our lives fully, can prevent us from reaping the bounty that life can be. To understand fear, you truly need to understand it's origins.

In the beginning, well before we were ever born, fear was the cornerstone to man's survival. Fear was the response that triggered our bodies to prepare for the three key survival responses: fight, flight, or fold. Fear resides in our emotional center - the part of our brain that held sway over our responses well before logic reared it's multidimensional head. Fear was king during a time when the human race focused 100% of it's time on food, water, and shelter/safety. Fear was key in ensuring that man lived to see another day. Then something happened.

Logic and language have taken the human race to places far beyond those early beginnings. We've been to the moon, we've cloned entire organisms, we've reordered our world in ways that were unimaginable to the original man. However, no matter how far we have come, no matter what the time and distance, fear is still with us. It is a part of our survival mechanism, and our bodies still react with the intent that fear has a purpose and that it's purpose embraces survival. The problem is, in today's world, fear can step in at the most inopportune and inappropriate moments. Where fear was once a welcome companion to survival, it has now become an obstacle to success and fulfillment.

There are no easy answers to this conundrum. For myself, just recognizing that fear, when it appears, can seem like a fish out of water. This recognition allows me to embrace it and, to some degree, put it to rest. You can give fear its due: I know that some people intentionally take risks and engage in risky behaviors. Fear and logic have the habit of dancing around each other, but logic can never truly touch fear, and when fear dominates, logic struggles for a hand hold. Awareness becomes the best determinant in managing fear. When fear is appropriate, let it lead you. When fear is not called for, honor that your body is responding in a way that has gotten mankind to this point. Give yourself the space and grace to move past fear, in these instances, into a place of logic. Make of your life what you want, fear should be your ally. You determine how it plays out in your life.